How To Be More Assertive (10 Ways To Assert Yourself With Confidence)
Learn how to be more assertive with these 10 keys. Be more assertive in relationships, work and in life. Assertive don't mean to be rude - it just means they respect themselves enough to be honest. Here are 8 things they do differently relationships. In this post, I flesh out all the components of assertiveness so that you can communicate clearly and effectively, check out this post!.
5 Tips to Increase Your Assertiveness
Should you feel the need to convince yourself, flip on the local news and watch for five minutes! It helps to have a disposition of assertiveness when things get hairy. We all experience good, bad, and neutral relationships.
Many have had someone many times, a trusted someone betray, harm, or unjustly oppose them.
Default mode is aggression and violence; they prey on the sheep. They act without a conscience. Innocent and loving; yet at times meek and passive.
They are targets of the wolves. Also benevolent and loving, yet have the capacity for swift action. Sheepdogs protect themselves, the sheep, and stand up to the wolves. What differentiates sheepdogs from wolves is their concern for the welfare and safety of others; acting with a purpose and with intelligence, and having a healthy mindset.
Should the need arise, the sheepdog will act swiftly and definitively, though it is neither their default or preferred state of being. In this story, the sheepdog is an ideal example of assertive behavior.
Relationships and Assertiveness Relationship-wise, assertiveness is acting in a manner appropriate for the person and situation. In relationships, the assertive person: In the context of relationships, here are eight things assertive people do differently: They know their intention Before you initiate a discussion or raise an issue, your intention should be well understood. When you engage in a semi-serious talk without having a plan the requisite knowledge, how to present ideas, etc.
3 Ways to Be Assertive in a Relationship - wikiHow
It could be a new job or a pay raise. It might be the intimacy and trust in your marriage. It could be any number of positive benefits you could enjoy if you permit temporary discomfort.
The reactions you receive will depend greatly on the other person or people involved. You may need to manage the timing of your statement or request based on the temperament of the person. Consider in advance how they might respond, and be prepared with a follow-up statement to support your reasoning.
This is especially true if you are being assertive on the job, as you need to back up your actions or statements with proof or evidence. You have some relationships in which the other person deserves being informed about your new, more assertive frame of mind.
8 Things Assertive People Do Differently In Their Relationship
Initiate a conversation with your spouse, partner, friend, or even your boss, in which you kindly but firmly acknowledge your past mindset and share your decision to be more assertive in the future.
Mention how assertive communication not only makes you a happier, more confident person but also how it will positively impact them. When you let others know how you want to be treated, they will generally rise to the occasion.
Proactive communication and dialog are essential in any relationship. Even as you work toward becoming more assertive, use good judgment and discretion. If your spouse is in the midst of a big project, now is not the time to ask for an intimate conversation. All relationships involve a certain amount of give and take as well as the ability to be discerning about timing and setting. Practice in manageable situations. As you begin the practice of being more assertive, keep a journal in which you document your efforts, your emotions around your efforts, and the responses of other people.
Give yourself a score from one to ten after every assertiveness encounter, with ten being completely uncomfortable and one being totally confident. You just need enough confidence in who you are and what you want in order to speak up in spite of fear or discomfort.
How to Be More Assertive at Work One of the most difficult scenarios to practice assertiveness for those who are uncomfortable with it is at work. Let's face it, your livelihood is on the line, and you don't want to risk angering your boss, upsetting a client, or offending a co-worker. Too much is at stake. But the truth is, healthy-minded, emotionally mature people respect those who are willing to step out of their comfort zone and calmly ask to be heard.
Here are a few tips for practicing assertiveness at work: Embrace your own value at your job. Remember, you have a lot to contribute as a person and a professional. Quiet your internal negative voice and rationally assess your value to the organization. Don't underestimate your worth. Are you expected to work overtime without pay? Do your co-workers interrupt you constantly?
Does a client neglect to pay invoices on time? You have a right to speak up about boundaries that aren't being respected. Understand the value of timing. Speaking up assertively has to be measured against the timing of the situation. If you want to ask your boss for a raise, but he just got the monthly expense reports, you may want to wait.
If you co-worker barges into your office in tears, perhaps you don't need to remind her of your request to knock first. Learn to read and judge personalities. You may need to massage the language or setting of your assertive requests or ideas based on the person you're talking to. For example, an insecure boss might not like you to disagree with him or her in a group setting but can hear you out when you present your ideas privately.
Develop a tough skin. Workplace settings are often rife with petty jealousies, territorial demands, and competition. Your assertiveness might be viewed by some with resentment or wariness. Don't allow the insecurities of others throw you off track. Remain confident in yourself and what you know is right for you.
Did you find these tips on assertiveness helpful? I hope these strategies for being more assertive have helped you and given you some ideas for practicing assertiveness at work and in your personal life.
Everyone needs to hone these skills and learn how to speak up for themselves. Pass on these confidence-boosting tips by sharing this post on your preferred social media platform.