We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us their best tips for surviving a long distance relationship. Here are their responses. (After these 25 tips, we also go over 8 self-help tips for those who are struggling personally with a long-distance relationship). Anyone committed to a long-distance relationship deserves a standing ovation. Not only are you putting in that extra effort every day, you're.
However, uncontrolled jealousy can lead to a destructive combination of suspicion, possessiveness, insecurity, anger, and shame. It is controlling the situation by simply refusing to engage. Distance makes this particularly easy to do hanging up or not answering or returning callsand it can drive your long distance partner crazy with frustration, second-guessing, and self-doubt.
Tackling this hot topic directly can help avoid assumptions and conflict. Do you know what your primary love language is? Do you know how to speak your partners? Also check out The Five Love Languages: What Do You Speak?
Everything You Need To Know About Long-Distance Relationships - AskMen
Build your love maps Your love map is your mental network of information about your partner—their interests, stories, what makes them tick, and things you love and admire about them. The more positive memories and associations you build into this love map, the stronger your relationship will be over time. Also check out The Sound Relationship House: Talking about these things and any growing feelings of jealousy or unease can save you a lot of heartache and conflict in the long run.
Share things with each other that have made you laugh. Surprise your partner every so often with something thoughtful Everyone loves getting a present, a bunch of flowers, or a handwritten letter in the mail.
Every so often, go the extra mile and do something extra and special to help your partner feel loved and valued. Bonus points if the gesture is uber-thoughtful. Make sure you have some reminders of your partner around—perhaps put their photo on your desktop or tape it to your mirror, drink out a coffee mug they gave you… the possibilities are endless. Find a way to involve and connect your partner with some of the other important relationships in your life. Everyone has different tips and tricks that help them cope better with the ups and downs that come with being in a long distance relationship.
Figure out what works for you, then do it.
Everything You Need To Know About Long-Distance Relationships
Build a life where you are. Do things that make you fitter, smarter, and happier. Do things that interest you.
Do these things alone, if need be. Remember, investing in yourself is another way of investing in your most important relationship. You will be happier and healthier in life if you have a strong network of friends beyond your partner.
To do that, you need to spend time connecting with them.
How To Make A Long Distance Relationship Work: 50 Best Tips
Know your limits, and then stay a couple of steps away from those limits. Visit often Visit each other as often as you can without over-stretching your budgets and schedules. Spending time together in person will help you learn new things about your partner and remind you of why being in the long distance relationship is worth it.
Make sure you get out and do something fun—hang with other friends, try a new restaurant, etc. Also try to mix in some normal life such as grocery shopping and cooking together.
You can, however, learn to say goodbye in ways that work for you or, at least, work better. Also check out Dreaded Departures: Plan ahead for how to best treat or support yourself during the first day or two after a visit ends. Also check out From Denial To Acceptance: One way to reduce the stress of all that coming and going is to plan ahead together for ways to reduce the burden on the stay-at-home partner during your times apart.
Spending some time on logistics before you leave will help them during your absence. It may not be very wise, for example, to go hang out with an attractive friend at a dance club on a night when you really really want to be holding your partner close.
Practice trusting Being apart from the person you love makes everyone feel insecure at times. You can start to doubt everything from how your partner feels about you, to whether they are staying faithful. But unless your partner has given you reason not to trust them, take a deep breath and choose to trust! It's not what they signed up for but they'll give it a shot.
As the end of the vacation draws near they spontaneously decide to remain in touch and see where things go. Are Long-Distance Relationships Possible? However, there are cases where both parties know that distance will be a factor they have to deal with before starting the relationship.
Anything beyond one and a half years is usually too long for most couples. Emails turned to chatting, to texts, to phone calls. There was a connection. We met in person and decided we could give it a go.
We didn't really discuss what would have to be done, and that was a mistake. We only lasted a year the first time. The distance was too much and too expensive to maintain.
About a year and a half later we tried it again. This time we were more conscious of what's involved. There is a whole lot of insecurity that arises in long-distance relationships.
Staying consistent helps — set phone call or FaceTime times.
Make Your Long Distance Relationship Easy & Fun | Modern Love Long Distance
Have dates over the phone, watching the same movie together. See each other as often as you can. Texts throughout the day just to stay connected help. We now play words with friends together, and it just keeps us connected and lets each other know we are there. Surprising each other with a card or something in the mail or flowers at work is a great way to keep the romance.
Long-distance relationships have a shelf life, and the key factor that makes this type of arrangement work is having an end goal or date in mind when it will be possible for the two of you to be in the same place together — whether that means one of you eventually leaves the company you're at after a period of time to look for work in the place you're relocating to, one of you finishes school, or whatever circumstance is the main disruptor that's keeping either of you from moving in order to be together.
Therefore, in order to maintain a long-distance relationship there has to be a 'light at the end of the tunnel. Without a light at the end of the tunnel it's only natural for couples to drift apart. It's the counting down of the months, weeks and days until one is finally done with the inconvenience of being in a long-distance relationship that keeps it strong.
If you begin an online dating relationship and know in your heart you will never relocate there is a good chance you've already determined the outcome of the relationship — especially if she or he has solidly established themselves as well. The more mature you are, the more you can delay gratification and put in the maintenance you need to stay in touch over the months [when you don't see each other].
You also have to be strong enough to resist temptation, which is typically more difficult that people think, and have tremendous trust in your partner. You're going to have to believe whatever your partner tells you about their habits and social life, and some people have a hard time doing that. I started to become jealous, snarky. That was new territory for me because I was always the 'cool girlfriend'.
I was angry with myself and he became annoyed with me understandably. That eventually led to several 'breaks' and eventually the final break-up. If you're going to try long distance, know that your relationship is going to change. Hopefully you'll be able to evolve together instead of letting the distance push you apart. If things are serious and you see a future, make sure to keep the other person your priority. Introduce them to any new friends because, inevitably there will be new friendsinclude them in any new routines, and visit as frequently as you can.
How To Handle The Long-Distance Talk Whether it's accidental, spontaneous or planned, approaching the conversation about committing to a long-distance relationship with your partner requires a hard talk where you lay everything out on the table.
Some people won't be able to handle a long-distance relationship, and they deserve to know quickly and bluntly so they can plan for the future.
If they are content with long distance love, then they still need to organize practical matters like how often they plan to visit, how to keep connected, dividing up shared assets, and so on. No hard feelings if this isn't for the other person. You are sparing yourself the hurt and pain, so don't try to talk someone into having a long-distance relationship if it isn't in the cards for you.